yourplayersaidwhat:

playing the Star Wars “Edge of the Empire” game, and the party has just narrowly defeated a group of Jabba’s palace guards in combat. The party consists of a Rogue Droid, a Gear Head, a Scoundrel, and a Force Sensitive. Two of the players have rolled for and sustained wounds from the encounter. 

GM: You managed to get the door open and enter a large droid maintenance room. Near the door is a sorry-looking droid puttering at a control panel. You are all bloody, beaten, and disheveled. He looks up at you as suspiciously as a droid can, and he says: “Are you supposed to be in here?”

Rogue Droid: YES.

GM: … Well, okay. Roll with Cool?

Rogue Droid: I got a 9 plus 1.

GM: So the droid completely believes you and turns back to his control panel. You’re in the clear.

Rogue Droid: And now I punch him while he’s not looking!

GM: Why? Uh, alright, roll with Hot.

Rogue Droid: (Silent for a few moments, then sighs.)

Gear Head: Well?

Rogue Droid: I rolled a 3.

GM: Your fist clanks weakly against the side of the droid’s head. He looks at you and discretely presses the intruder alarm. The alarm is now sounding loudly. What do you do?

Rogue Droid: I’m so sorry.

Gear Head: Ugh. Can I access the control panel remotely?

Scoundrel: I’M GONNA PERFORM A SHINING WIZARD ON ‘IM!

GM: What the fuck is a Shining Wizard?

Gear Head: It’s a wrestling move.

Scoundrel pulls up a YouTube video of the wrestling move being executed. GM is at a loss.

GM: Fine, roll with Hot.

Scoundrel: I ROLLED A 12.

Force Sensitive: Oh my God.

GM: You perform the move and his head explodes. He is effectively dead. 

Scoundrel: SHIIINING WIZAAARD!